What to Write in a Retirement Card

The four lines that always work

If the envelope is already in your hand, any two of these makes a card that gets kept.

A specific memory

Name one thing that actually happened. "The office is going to be a lot quieter without someone shouting at the printer" beats "you will be missed", because only one of them is about this person.

A specific thanks

Thank them for a thing, not for everything. "Thanks for covering for me the week my dad was ill. I never properly said." is the kind of line people keep for twenty years.

A joke about the job, not the person

Works: "Congratulations on escaping. Send a postcard from the outside." Also works: "Please leave the password on a sticky note like everyone else." Does not work: anything about age, memory, knees or naps.

A date, a place or a phone number

"Pint in October? I will message you." A card with a plan in it is worth more than a card with a poem in it, and it is the single most useful thing anybody writes in one.

If you know them a bit

Use a small true observation rather than an intimacy you have not earned. "You always knew where everything was. Nobody else does. We are going to struggle." takes twenty seconds and is not awkward.

If you are the boss

Name a specific thing they did, mention something they were never thanked for, and leave a door open only if you mean it. A vague offer of future work from a manager gets read literally and then waited for.

What should you write in a retirement card?

Write one specific thing rather than a general good wish. A single concrete detail about the person or the job beats any amount of warmth, because the warmth is interchangeable and the detail is not.

The average leaving card is a page of near-identical sentences, and the reason is not that people do not care. The card arrives with no warning, at a desk, mid-task. Everybody can see what everybody else has written, so the first person sets the register and the next thirty match it.

The honest thing most people want to say, which is some version of "I have known you for years, I liked you, and I do not know what happens next", has no accepted form of words in English. So people write "all the best for the future" and pass it on.

A specific detail solves it in one line and takes twenty seconds.

What do you write if you barely know them?

Write something short and true rather than faking a closeness you do not have. "Good luck, and enjoy it" is a perfectly acceptable card entry.

A better version adds one honest observation without claiming intimacy: "We have never worked together properly but everyone speaks well of you, so good luck."

Faking closeness reads as exactly what it is, and it makes the genuine entries around it look thinner.

What are funny things to write in a retirement card?

The funny lines that work aim the joke at the job, not at the person. Jokes about age, memory, knees or hearing are the most common own goal at a British leaving do.

The recipient reads every line in that card, usually twice, usually at home. Half the office signs it without reading the others, so nobody notices that the age jokes have stacked up.

The person retiring is often in their sixties and in good health, and about to have a considerably more active decade than whoever wrote "enjoy your well-earned rest".

What should a manager write in a retirement card?

A manager should name one specific thing the person did, mention something they were never thanked for, and only leave a door open if they mean it.

A vague "we would love to have you back" from a manager is read literally and then waited for. If there is no budget and no plan, leave it out; the warmth is welcome and the false lead is not.

Do not write about the restructure, the succession plan, or the future of the department. It is a card.

What do you write when the retirement is not a happy one?

Write something short and warm that does not mention the circumstances at all, then add your phone number.

Ill health, a restructure, a departure everybody knows more about than is being said aloud. The instinct is to write something breezy, which reads badly, or to say nothing, which reads worse.

"Thanks for everything. My number is below if you ever fancy a coffee." Then actually put the number. That is the part that matters and almost nobody does it.

What is the best thing to put in a leaving card?

A date. Name a month, a place and your phone number, because "do not be a stranger" is the most-said and least-actioned sentence at any leaving do.

The person leaving almost never feels able to be the one who suggests meeting up. Whoever writes an actual arrangement in the card is doing more for that leaver over the next six months than the collection did.

Common questions

What should you write in a retirement card?

Write one specific thing rather than a general good wish. A single concrete detail about the person or the job is worth more than a paragraph of warm sentiment, because the sentiment is interchangeable between every card in the envelope and the detail is not. The cards people keep for decades are almost always the ones with a specific memory, a specific thanks, or an arrangement to meet in them.

What are good funny things to write in a retirement card?

The funny lines that land aim the joke at the job rather than at the person. "Congratulations on escaping, send a postcard from the outside" works. "Please leave the password on a sticky note like everyone else" works. Jokes about age, memory, knees, hearing or naps are the most common mistake, because half the office signs the card without reading the others and the age jokes stack up unnoticed.

What do you write in a retirement card for someone you do not know well?

Something short and honest is better than a faked closeness. "Good luck, and enjoy it" is perfectly acceptable. A slightly better version adds one true observation without claiming a friendship, such as "We have never worked together properly but everyone speaks well of you, so good luck."

What should a manager write in a retirement card?

A manager should name one specific thing the person did that mattered, mention something they were never thanked for, and only leave a door open to future work if they genuinely mean it. A vague offer of coming back is read literally by the recipient and then waited for. Avoid mentioning the restructure or the succession plan.

Is it rude to write something short in a leaving card?

No. Not everybody has to be moving, and a short honest line reads better than a long invented one. The only real error is writing nothing at all when you had something specific you could have said.